Active listening and reflecting feelings to the person you’re listening to can help you practice empathy. You may be sharing a challenging or joyous experience with the speaker, and understanding their emotions can help you be a safe person to talk with. In a world filled with constant distractions and fast-paced lifestyles, the simple act of truly listening to your spouse can have a profound impact on your relationship.
I guess I am feeling overwhelmed by just how much of my experience has been informed by trauma. I just watched a video on Instagram from a trauma therapist to “good kids”, kids that no parent had to worry about. She was going to list off a few things that these kids needed to know but probably never heard. One of them was that they are not a burden.
All those decades of effort weren’t wasted, though. They kept you going, kept you functioning, and likely protected you from deeper pain when you weren’t ready to face it. That effort was what you needed at the time to survive, even if it wasn’t the thing that could truly heal you. The fear of not having the energy to follow through is so valid. You don’t have to dig yourself out all at once.
💔 When Learning Heals
- Recovery doesn’t have to be an endless sprint—it can be about small moments of rest, of noticing, of letting yourself feel, and then stepping back when you need to.
- This will hurt her further and she probably won’t soon forget.
- Lisa shared that she had felt sidelined by Sharon’s decisions and that her work commitments made it harder for her to contribute as Sharon expected.
I have been fascinated to learn what good listening actually is, what gets in the way and how we can get better at it for the sake of the people in our lives. Notice what happens in you.Maybe your chest tightens.Maybe your mind starts organizing solutions.Maybe you feel impatient, responsible, jealous, or even slightly afraid. We think we’re listening when we’re really just reloading.Waiting for our turn.Preparing the response.Crafting the solution.
Listening & Leadership – Why They’re Connected
We don’t create distance; we create a space where people feel valued and respected. Unlike sympathy, which can often unintentionally separate us, empathy brings us closer. Insight means being aware of and understanding yourself and your partner, recognizing the consequences of your actions, and learning from your mistakes. Mutuality www.app.talkshoe.com/show/bestdates means recognizing that both people have needs, both are legitimate, and both deserve to be met.
Crappy Behavior Is Eroding Your Relationship
This helps the other person feel acknowledged without pressure. Prepare Yourself MentallyBefore entering a conversation, let go of any assumption that you need to provide answers. Set an intention to be present and to support the speaker. It’s a brilliant way to practice the art of listening well. So often people know what they need to do, they already have the answers inside of themself.
Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of another. Instead of immediately offering solutions, take a moment to empathize with your spouse’s emotions. Put yourself in their shoes and try to see the situation from their perspective.
That fear is so valid—it makes sense that you’d want to hold these revelations tightly, fearing they’ll slip away if you don’t keep repeating them. When you’ve already had to relearn things before, it must feel like forgetting would erase the hard-won progress you’ve made. No wonder you feel the need to keep them close. It’s okay to not trust it fully right away.